{"id":4427,"date":"2019-02-22T22:31:35","date_gmt":"2019-02-22T22:31:35","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/denisaneacsu.wordpress.com\/?p=4427"},"modified":"2020-04-20T21:05:28","modified_gmt":"2020-04-20T21:05:28","slug":"cum-sa-fii-partial-fericit-a-in-5000-de-pasi-deloc-simpli","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/denisaneacsu.ro\/index.php\/2019\/02\/22\/cum-sa-fii-partial-fericit-a-in-5000-de-pasi-deloc-simpli\/","title":{"rendered":"P\u0103rerea mea despre self-help"},"content":{"rendered":"

\u00a0<\/p>\n

Pare aproape inutil s\u0103 mai adaug c\u0103 \u00eentr-o lume \u00een care \u0219tim mai multe dec\u00e2t tr\u0103im, a afla secretele <\/strong>\u00eembog\u0103\u021birii (sunt secrete mai publice, printate in 3 milioane de exemplare) e o glum\u0103 ieftin\u0103.<\/p>\n

C\u0103r\u021bile de self-help sunt doar hran\u0103 pentru auto-critic\u0103 \u0219i disonan\u021b\u0103 cognitiv\u0103: „dac\u0103 am citit cartea despre cum s\u0103 am bani \u0219i \u00een continuare nu am, e ceva \u00een neregul\u0103 cu mine”. Nu mai zic c\u0103 simplific\u0103 lucrurile p\u00e2n\u0103 la dispari\u021bie, dilueaz\u0103 ideile p\u00e2n\u0103 nu mai r\u0103m\u00e2ne dec\u00e2t un eventual pas, singurul, inevitabilul, care duce la schimbare.<\/p>\n

Acest pas devine salt care te propulseaz\u0103 (adesea doar imaginar) \u00eentr-un scenariu de via\u021b\u0103 care promite fericirea, dar aia social construit\u0103. Dar nu s-a g\u00e2ndit nimeni la un backup plan, dac\u0103 eu devin bogat\u0103 \u0219i nu \u00eemi place? Dac\u0103 o sa devin eficient\u0103 \u0219i constat c\u0103 nu m\u0103 simt mai bine? Sau mai tragic, va fi posibil s\u0103 \u00eemi declan\u0219ez motiva\u021bia \u0219i apoi nu m\u0103 mai pot opri, voi face continuu proiecte de succes \u00eempotriva voin\u021bei mele. Sau voi sf\u00e2r\u0219i ca \u00een basmul cu pantofii ro\u0219ii ai prin\u021besei, voi fi condamnat\u0103 la optimism \u0219i \u00een mod clar \u00eemi voi pierde to\u021bi prietenii, obi\u0219nui\u021bi mai degrab\u0103 cu sarcasm \u0219i ironie.<\/p>\n

\u0218i cea mai grav\u0103 dintre toate acuza\u021biile este c\u0103 aceste c\u0103r\u021bi insult\u0103 miliarde de emo\u021bii \u0219i tr\u0103iri, le neag\u0103 sau le consider\u0103 neproductive, condamn\u0103 p\u0103r\u021bi \u00eentregi din experien\u021ba noastr\u0103 uman\u0103, pentru a ne da la schimb un portret vag schi\u021bat despre a fi awesome tot timpul.<\/p>\n

Eu m\u0103 bucur c\u0103 partea asta cu re\u021betele nu func\u021bioneaz\u0103, pentru c\u0103 asta \u00eenseamn\u0103 c\u0103 nu suntem robo\u021bi \u0219i nici xerox-uri care multiplic\u0103 cine \u0219tie ce american-dream, care se transforma \u00een romanian nightmare.<\/p>\n

L\u00e2ng\u0103 raftul cu c\u0103r\u021bi de self-help, eu propun s\u0103 existe \u0219i unul de no-help, cu c\u0103r\u021bi oneste despre ce po\u021bi schimba \u0219i ce nu \u00een via\u021b\u0103, cu promisiuni prudente \u0219i mai ales cu respect fa\u021b\u0103 de experien\u021ba omului.<\/p>\n

„E\u0219ti trist\/\u0103 azi \u0219i te sim\u021bi mizerabil? E un semn c\u0103 e\u0219ti om \u0219i probabil ai toate motivele s\u0103 te sim\u021bi a\u0219a. Dac\u0103 ai nevoie de ajutor, sigur, \u00eel po\u021bi cere, dar asta nu \u00eenseamn\u0103 c\u0103 e ceva gre\u0219it la starea ta sau ca e musai s\u0103 fii ajutat\/\u0103. Ajutorul e ceva op\u021bional, cerut de tine \u0219i nu \u00eenseamn\u0103 c\u0103 nu te-ai descurca la fel de bine \u0219i singur\/\u0103. Uneori e mai simplu \u00eempreun\u0103 cu al\u021bi oameni, at\u00e2ta tot. Oricum ar fi, e ok.”<\/p>\n

sau<\/p>\n

„Dac\u0103 vrei s\u0103 faci o schimbare de dragul schimb\u0103rii, go ahead. Numai c\u0103 dup\u0103 ce vei citi aceast\u0103 carte, via\u021ba ta va r\u0103m\u00e2ne exact la fel, tu \u00ee\u021bi vei continua obiceiurile \u0219i nu ai motive s\u0103 te sim\u021bi aiurea pentru asta. O carte e doar o carte, nu e un pa\u0219aport c\u0103tre o via\u021b\u0103 nou\u0103, pentru c\u0103 asta ar implica faptul c\u0103 via\u021ba asta pe care o ai e veche, sau nepotrivit\u0103. Departe de a fi expirate, vie\u021bile noastre sunt cei mai buni speakeri motiva\u021bionali, experien\u021ba e CEO-ul cel mai cool. Pentru unii oameni, planurile nu func\u021bioneaz\u0103. Nici mesajele spuse \u00een oglind\u0103 sau aplica\u021biile sofisticate despre cum s\u0103 te treze\u0219ti la 5 \u0219i s\u0103 te motivezi p\u00e2n\u0103 la refuz. Astfel de oameni au nevoie de o \u00eembr\u0103\u021bisare, o \u00eenghe\u021bat\u0103, o g(l)um\u0103, o vorb\u0103 bun\u0103, o plimbare. Pe toate acestea nu le vei ob\u021bine din cartea aceasta de no-help. \u00cen cartea aceasta \u00ee\u021bi spun mai degrab\u0103 \u00een ce fel nu pot s\u0103 te ajut.”<\/p>\n

Cultura self-helpului nu face dec\u00e2t s\u0103 pun\u0103 presiune pe persoan\u0103, d\u00e2ndu-i un sentiment de singur\u0103tate \u0219i ap\u0103sare, de\u0219i e minunat s\u0103 ne baz\u0103m \u0219i pe al\u021bii \u0219i s\u0103 ne ajut\u0103m \u00eentre noi ca oameni pentru a face existen\u021ba aceasta cel pu\u021bin suportabil\u0103.<\/p>\n

\n
\n
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Photo by\u00a0Dan Meyers<\/a>\u00a0on\u00a0Unsplash<\/a><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n\n\n

\"\"<\/figure>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

\u00a0 Pare aproape inutil s\u0103 mai adaug c\u0103 \u00eentr-o lume \u00een care \u0219tim mai multe dec\u00e2t tr\u0103im, a afla secretele \u00eembog\u0103\u021birii (sunt secrete mai publice, printate in 3 milioane de exemplare) e o glum\u0103 ieftin\u0103. C\u0103r\u021bile de self-help sunt doar hran\u0103 pentru auto-critic\u0103 \u0219i disonan\u021b\u0103 cognitiv\u0103: „dac\u0103 am citit cartea despre cum s\u0103 am bani […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[8],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"\nP\u0103rerea mea despre self-help - Denisa Neac\u0219u<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/denisaneacsu.ro\/index.php\/2019\/02\/22\/cum-sa-fii-partial-fericit-a-in-5000-de-pasi-deloc-simpli\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"ro_RO\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"P\u0103rerea mea despre self-help - Denisa Neac\u0219u\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"\u00a0 Pare aproape inutil s\u0103 mai adaug c\u0103 \u00eentr-o lume \u00een care \u0219tim mai multe dec\u00e2t tr\u0103im, a afla secretele \u00eembog\u0103\u021birii (sunt secrete mai publice, printate in 3 milioane de exemplare) e o glum\u0103 ieftin\u0103. 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